THE EDGE OF WHAT??



(copied from Dallas Observer Online)
"This weekend, Pizza Hut Park in Frisco will host Edgefest 17, an all-day, three-stage concert featuring some of the biggest names in alt-rock.

If you like the bands that KDGE-102.1 FM plays ad nauseam, you'll absolutely love this lineup. Your only problem will be convincing your parents to shell out $49.50 per ticket and drive you there.

Because this is the 17th year of Edgefest, we figured we'd preview the show by describing each act on the first and second stages in haiku form. Why haiku? Well, a haiku's 5-7-5 scheme adds up to 17 syllables. And that sounded like as good a reason as any.

First Stage

3 DOORS DOWN

Post-grunge should be banned
"Kryptonite" is aptly named
It drains my life force

MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE

Started out emo
Then tried to turn into Queen
At least they're sincere

BLUE OCTOBER

Boring frat-rock failed
So they bought some eyeliner
Their fans are suckers

SEETHER

"Can't fight the Seether"
Remember Veruca Salt?
Forget this band too

PUDDLE OF MUDD

Extra D for "Dumb"
More regurgitated grunge
Nickelback meets Creed

CHEVELLE

Christians—yes or no?
Who cares? They suck either way
Tool for sheltered dorks

FINGER ELEVEN

These guys can't decide
Who they want to imitate:
Staind or Jars of Clay?

FILTER

"Hey, Man, Nice Shot" ruled
Finally, a decent band
Just a decade late

MISER
Bland, generic rock

Pretty boys with jailbait fans
Why cover "Zombie"?
Second Stage

STORY OF THE YEAR

Alt-rock with street teams
Manufactured fashioncore
Focus-grouped screamo

ATREYU

Ooh, they cuss. Badass!
Better not let Mom hear this
Hot Topic metal

10 YEARS

Chunka-chunk guitars
Melodramatic singing
Butt-rock from Knoxville

SICK PUPPIES

Dreadful, soulless rock
"Free Hugs" video is sweet
If the sound's turned off

DRIVE BY
Cheesy, but not bad
Teen angst and bombastic rock
Nice guitar parts too

DRIVE A
15-year-old punks
Feisty L.A. rock with heart
Should headline this mess"

and I say unto thee...
YEP NAILED IT. Your HaiKu is dead on.

I feel sorry for the DJs that have to act excited when they spin listerine by bush. and the EDGE computer gets rebooted every few hours and starts by playing Smashing Pumpkins DISARM again and again and again....edge of 1996. then we throw a new clone band then we play some leftover stone temple pilots for good measure.
I own some of these Discs myself but I cant listen to em anymore the edge has exploited/perverted my listening pleasure. I mean look at the coachella line up , lollapalooza line up, Hell take a drive down 35 and look at the ACL line up...WE ARE DALLAS FORT WORTH MUTHER F**KERS. The history of DFW goes way way back to the birth of rock when some blues dude sold his soul on the corner of rosedale...fast forward we got Kurt cobain getting in a fight here at our own TREES(rip) toadies..man theres music all over the place and taste to boot but damn if i hear it on THE EDGE...NOT!!!


I went to the first edge fest...I'm that old, pearl jam, sugarcubes, psychinfunkapus man There was alot of goodness diversity , the edge meant edgy. I'm not sure what has happened but this is what happens when music is cooperate driven. I'm sad, sick and angry that this edgefest is "THE EDGE" of entertainment. build it they shall come...put a big bucket of crap in the middle of it and sell pizza for twelve dollars a slice. 5 bucks a water. and the gas to get there. damn

shame on the program directors, if they be man they sit to wee, if they be female, most likely they are a big "richard"
edge of what i ask ye.

lets take a moment in grievance for the bands we wont be hearing that passed us right by cause the edge wont ever hip us to them.
(que taps please)
BAND OF HORSES
MGMT
STARS
A.S.G
OCTOPUS PROJECT
BLACK KEYS
VAMPYRE WEEKEND
N.E.R.D
IRON & WINE
VALLIANT THORR
THE STRANGE BOYS
TEGAN SARA
(new) BREEDERS
(new) RECANTEURS
LES CLAYPOOL
MY MORNING JACKET
The LASH OUTS
AUTOLUX
BIRDS of AVALON
DRESSY BESSY
ELF POWER
OF MONTREAL
(new)RADIOHEAD
Bloc Party
KASABIAN
Broken Social SCENE
Explosions in the sky
flaming Lips

marko

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